Prayers for Odin and Loki…..a.k.a. Time For What’s Personal to Become More Public

Yesterday I presented a circle casting for a ritual I’m planning next week.  I very much wanted the rite to be somewhat general in its layout so that the participants could take away things from it that they needed, but not feel like they were pushed into something that felt like a specific rite from a specific spectrum of paganism (e.g., a ‘Heathen’ or ‘Wiccan’ rite).  I also didn’t want it to feel like things were simply ‘pulled’ from those specific spectrums.

So a lot of the rite are things that I have written specifically for this ceremony.  But when it came time to write an invocation to divinity, I found I was blocked from writing anything down, but couldn’t figure out why.  So after some prayers and mental soul-searching, the prayers below came out.  After that, I was able to write the rest of my ceremony.

I’m still not sure if what I’ve written are more invocations or dictations of what these two Gods mean to me, but they both had to come out before I could write anything to any other deity.  I’m ecstatic at how they turned out.  I truly do enjoy both and their personal feel to me.  They feel very powerful and profound.  But after looking them over and preparing to transfer them from the scrap paper to my poem collection, I realized that my requirements to these Gods was not yet finished.

I needed to share both of these prayers here, on this blog.

Even as I type this post, I am still fighting doing this.  And the excuses are continuing to flying around in my head for why I shouldn’t do it.  Today is the autumnal equinox.  I should be posting about that instead of doing this.  I just posted yesterday, I should wait and post this next week or later because I don’t like doing a lot of posts and then nothing at all for weeks on end.  And the one that is really stopping me; these prayers are too personal to publish.

But I’m not getting out of this, and I already know that.

The more I think about it, the more I realize that perhaps I’ve not been ‘putting myself out there’ as much as I should be, or how they want me to.  I’ve talked months before on this blog about building a religious path for myself; one that has specific prayers, specific traditions and offerings that speak to who I am, what I believe and whom I serve.  I’ve also put myself out there as serving the pagan community as a whole.  But I’ve stayed away from labeling myself as anything other than a pagan. These prayers, with their kennings and truths very much do that.  They are an open book to how I view myself and my relationship with these Gods.

So without further excuses, I offer the prayers here.  Feel free to comment and discuss.  I know I’ll be thinking about this exercise for some time as I figure out my adversity to doing it.

Invocation to Loki
Hail to Thee!
Laugaz, my light
Lover, my longing
Fire Jotun, my power
Mind tester, my teacher
Sight minder, my vision
Bound God, my burden
Flame hair, my delight
Cinder maker, my wrath
Hail to you, my Loki


Invocation to Odin
Hail, All Father
Song singer, my voice for you
Wisdom seeker, may I learn your cunning
Teacher, may I learn your teachings
Warrior, may I grow in prowess
One Eyed, may I seek to know and understand
Yule Figure, may I learn joy and unknowing
Rune God, may I learn the Runes
Shapeshifter, may I learn the Seidh
Slain God – may I learn to give of myself
May I ever be your daughter



Poem:  I Am

I finished writing this poem today and present it here for thoughts.  I am quite fond of it, although some people have read it and been uncomfortable with its expressions.

The poem speaks to my life.  I am coming to the end of a significant amount of Shadow work, and this is a celebration of that.  I have reclaimed and am healing shards of my soul, embraced many of my issues and wrestled with personal demons.  I feel like now I come from a place of power that was meant for me, if only I dared to come this far.

Perhaps that is why this poem makes people so uncomfortable.



I Am

I am the uncomfortable silence,
I am the calm before the storm.
A friend may partake in my peace
While the foe shall hear no alarm.

I am sister-wife of The Mad,
I am the daughter of Gangleri.
A friend shall enjoy my aid,
While the foe fearful of my company.

I am she who rests in nightmares,
I dance where others dare creep.
Do not think that I am defenseless
Attack me, and pain you shall reap

Is there still a question of my loyalty?
Do I still belong in the house I dwell?
Oh I assure you, the wolf within is quite content,
Yet ever willing to come out of my shell

Feeling Connections

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

~ Howard Thurman



Over the year that I have been working with Loki, Sigyn and Odin, I have found a happiness that I never thought was possible within religion.  In all of my years as a practicing Christian, I never felt the Christian God the way I feel the ones that I am working with now.  Yes, the Christian God felt alive to me, but I didn’t “feel” like one of “his” children.  Even when I was doing other pagan and Wiccan practices, I never felt so close to the Gods as I do now.  The more devotional things I do for Odin, Sigyn and Loki, the more I feel and hear them.

I wonder if in today’s constant strife regarding the role of religion if this is something that we are lacking.  We see a lot of posts about how and what people think about their Gods, their practice and what other people should or shouldn’t do, but we aren’t seeing many posts about how we FEEL about our Gods.  Perhaps if we looked at how we feel about our Gods, and in turn how they feel about us, we wouldn’t have as much argument.  It doesn’t matter how we find our own ways to get there, but in the end, if you are content with your practice and feel the connections to the Gods, then that connection can be a starting point to reach out to other religions.

My connections to my Gods make me feel alive.  They soothe my soul and make me feel whole.  Odin helps me to understand that I do not know everything, and that I have a long road to get to the level of understanding that I want to be at.  He recognizes that I have value in who I am and in what I do, and that I’m not afraid of going outside that which I know in order to get something done, especially in his honor.

My connection to Loki is one that is very hard to describe.  I feel his passion and fire within me, and that has gotten me through rough times, especially when I am having a hard time with my chronic pain.  Loki also helps me learn to accept all of myself.  This includes those pieces of me that I feel are less than desirable.  I’m allowed to be angry, I’m allowed to dislike things.  But I am also allowed to recognize those feelings but that I don’t have to DO anything about them.  I can let things go as they may; I don’t have to make everything right for everyone, or even for myself.  And while I am not constantly on the lookout for the rug to be pulled out from under me in some aspect of my life, I recognize that it may happen.  And when it does, I am enough to do whatever it is that is needed to make the best out of the situation.

Sigyn is a much deeper lady than anyone gives her credit for.  To know her is to know that there are other aspects of her that she does not show to many.  She is the consoler, but she also does not let people shirk their duties because of their pain.  She asks of you to do what it is you can, to find the limit and work to it, then to recognize that that is enough.  Some days those limits are higher than others.  Sometimes they are much lower.  Either way, that is OK.  She also teaches that once you have met the limit, Rest for your body and for your soul is always necessary.   She is the champion of us who have chronic illness, a lady of quiet wisdom and strength, and a child of wonder and awe.  She is someone you must sit with for a time as she must know you before she opens herself to you.

Some readers may also remember that I am the holder of a medicine pipe of Native American traditions.  This relationship too has been solidified over the year.  I am not as afraid as I once was of the power that likes within the sumac and pipestone.  Instead, I recognize that its purpose is to help heal and teach those who are within its influence.  Ceremonies with the pipe are not things that happen often, but when they do, they will need to be done very carefully and purposefully.  And even when the pipe is in its bags, proper respect is still expected.  I find myself still giving offerings to it whenever I feel it is necessary.  Finally, the pipe doesn’t have to be out to speak.  It will speak to whomever it needs to, whenever the time is right.

A year ago I made pacts with these Gods that I would renew within a year and a day so long as they still wanted me, and I still felt comfortable with them.  Now I recognize that the connections that I have made with them will last much, much longer.  And I am absolutely OK with this.  It feels so nice to finally find a home.  It just took me throwing out some of the things that others taught and feeling my way through my own truth.

Perhaps speaking about these connections will help others speak about their own feelings regarding their relationships with the Gods.  Perhaps they will think on how they feel, and recognize that we all have a common starting point; the joy and comfort the Gods bring as well as the continuous lessons that we receive on a day to day basis.  I don’t expect this post to change all that.  But it might get some people thinking at least about expressing their own connections to divinity.  And even if it doesn’t, I’m still happy at the fact that I can express the relationships that I have had a hand in making for myself.

Photo from Deviant Art.

A Story of Death and Rebirth


The night started like any other normal night.  As night fell, I retired to my bedroom in order to prepare for sleep.  However, upon lying down I felt the gentle ‘pull’ on my spirit.  The Gods had other plans in mind for me than simply roaming around within the dream world.    Tonight would be instead a journey to the realms of spirit in order to learn another lesson.  I quickly made the necessary preparations and prepared to go where I was lead.

Upon closing my eyes I found myself staring at a funeral pyre that was yet to be lit.  There were no tears from the others watching with me.  Instead, the sense in the air was that something powerful was about to happen.  No one was here to mourn.  Instead, they were here to witness rebirth.

Once I recognized that important difference, I felt the wood on my back as I found myself lying down on top of the pyre, chained there so that I could not move.  I frantically searched through my mind, and looked over at the other version of myself still staring at the pyre.

‘This can’t be right’ I thought, panic starting to set in.  Frantically I tried to pull my spirit away, but it was no use.  I was tied to the pile of wood very well.  Nonetheless, I continued to struggle

‘This is meant to be’ I heard a male voice say. The voice calmed my fears some, so I stopped struggling.

It was then that I saw a spectator light the wood at my feet.

In the physical world fire burns quickly.  I’ve heard fire doubles in size every four seconds.  But here, it felt like it took forever to catch.  Finally, I could feel it close in on my feet and legs.  The sensation was nothing like I had never felt before.  Thankfully, there was no pain, but that didn’t mean the destruction of the fire was lessened any.  I looked down and watched as the skin of my arms started to blister and be burned away exposing the muscle and bone underneath.  The flames lapped at my torso, and again I watched the blistering and burning of my skin.  In moments I was looking down at my ribs and could see my organs aflame through the bone.  I tried to breathe but flames instead entered my nose and mouth.  I could feel them as they burned away the nasal tissue and found their way into my lungs.

The flames got hotter then, and my bones started to burn away.  By now I could no longer see as my eyes were turned to dust.  But I could still feel the flame and it’s power burning my body away.  And as the dust started to accumulate I realized that no longer was I the body that had burned, but instead I was the flame.  I opened my new eyes and realized I was born again a giantess.  All around me was the world of fire as I walked.  I felt the destruction of the flame and knew that I would in time I would destroy everything.  I would be the one to set everything on fire.  I was drunk with the power of destruction and death, loving every moment that I controlled that power.

Then I knew it was time to transform again, and I started to feel a slight chill.  It started to become harder to move forward and I realized the power of the fire was retreating into me as the outside of my body started to chill and turn blue from cold.  Quickly my environment changed from fire to one of ice and snow.  Finally I could no longer moved and I feared I would be stuck within the block of Ice I had become forever.

It was then I saw Loki walking toward me.  The fire god was not in human form, but rather a walking ball of flame.  Lovingly he embraced the block of ice I had become and I felt myself melting back into my human form. Yet, even though I looked the same as I did before the journey started, I felt very much transformed.

I heard the male voice speak again.  ‘You will go through this transformation again and again until you give up all that you do not need and allow it to be burned away.  How many times you must endure the flame is up to you.

And then, just as abruptly as it came, the journey ended, and I awoke in my own bed, my husband sleeping next to me.

The next day I did feel different.  I cannot put my finger on the specifics, but I know that the journey changed me to my core.  I no longer fear  that which I once did.  And if that fear does come back I immediately see and feel the flames on my body.  I know them now as a reminder of what it was I endured, and a signal to know that I am attempting to carry something once again I do not need any longer.

This is a transformation that I have been deeply grateful for.  Although it scared me, it was one that was needed, and had I known it was coming, I probably wouldn’t have had the guts to lay on that funeral pyre myself.  I know it happened the way that it needed to.  However next time I may have to make the choice to burn in flame myself.

Photo by Mirovia from Deviant Art

Reclaiming my ancestry…ALL of it.

I had thought that 2016 was going to be all about Odin, Loki and the other Northern teachings that I had to learn.    I knew some of those teachings were going to take me out of  my comfort zones, strip me bare and remold me into the shape of a person that was more true to my ancestry and more of a reflection of my spirit.

Little did I know that the focus was to include my ancestry as a native to Turtle Island as well.

Last year I was gifted an (unawakened) Native American Sacred Pipe.  It is meant to be a personal one, made with an elbow bowl.  I have been repeatedly told by a Native friend that the pipe needs to be awakened. Today I received another message that the pipe requires awakening, but this time it was in the form of a rune reading done by a Northern Tradition Shaman.  A rune reading….seriously?

Ok, I’ll take the hint before it becomes a clue-by-four to the forehead.

I was planning on waiting until I knew everything about that pipe I could know.   I wanted the ceremony for it to go like clockwork; everything spelled out and memorized, rehearsed and the moon to be in the right position.  And instead, I am putting things together on the fly to be ready the next new moon, when the pipe will be ready.

I just don’t know if I will be.

A personal pipe is a sacred and its care should not be taken lightly.  It is a responsibility you take on for life.  I know this, and I do not want to disrespect this in any shape or fashion.  But like the last post about Odin, I recognize now that I have let these responsibilities being offered to me scare me to the point of inaction.  It is time for me to trust the spirit within myself, the knowledge that I have gained over the years and my instinct.  My intention is good, and because of this I need to move on even though I might cause some disrespect from my ignorance.  If I do, I apologize and learn from it.

I believe now that Odin has a piece of this to play.  Maybe not in the ceremony for the pipe, but I believe him to be expecting me to pick up my responsibilities and move forward with them.  Perhaps this means that this year will be full of situations where I get to practice that which I had forgotten and learn new skills based upon those foundations.  I cannot say that I am not scared by this.  But if that is what I am to expect I will do my best to not run, nor to freeze with fear.  I am more than what I have become and it is time to take up that mantle, no matter how scary.  If this is truly the will of the Gods, So Shall it be.

Who wants to talk to me?

About 17 years ago I had dealings with the first pagan outside the teachings of Wicca.  That particular gentleman was Heathen.  We started discussing our practices, and was very startled at his reaction when I told him about the drawing down of the Gods done in some rituals.

It seems he had a beyond healthy (at least in my mind) fear of his Gods, particularly Odin.  In his belief, if we were in a Wiccan circle to call down the Norse Gods like that, he pretty much figured there would be hell to pay.  I did dismiss his fears, because at that point as a first degree, I felt comfortable enough to respect what it was that happened in circle and that I knew what my own boundaries were.

However, I did make a note of his fear.  There had to be some reason for it.

Through the years I have heard similar tales of fear, and again, mostly about Odin.  More recently I have come to know about the term ‘Godslave’ and met a couple of them who felt they were enslaved by (you guessed it) Odin.  Moreover, I heard stories from these Godslaves about how they were chosen, and forced to do Odin’s will.  I also have been doing a lot of reading about him and the other Norse Gods, and can now understand some of where that fear comes from.

Now that I am foraging a new path forward for myself, I even have some of that same fear as well, especially because I am not as familiar with the magical framework of that pantheon as I am with others.

So with all of this in mind, I bet you can imagine my surprise (and fear) when doing a monthly journey to honor and talk to Loki that I end up crossing paths with Odin.

From what I could understand, it seems his interest in me was peaked when I started doing regular work and giving offerings under Loki, Eir and Sigyn’s guidance.

I don’t feel like I can go into a lot of specifics at this point about what he had said.  To be honest, with as much as I have heard about his manipulative ways I don’t truly know if I want to even deal with him.  But I will say that I am still pretty shocked that he came to see me.  I tried giving offerings to him when I started my Norse work awhile ago and never felt a thing from him.  So I think him visiting me is a pretty big thing.

So right now I am just trying to take it in.  I left an offering for him to thank him for his visit, and have left my hand made runes next to the offering.  Perhaps I will ask him for aid in understanding them, perhaps I will just leave a second offering and let it go.  I am not certain about the concept of a Godslave, but it is absolutely NOT a path I wish to even consider.

For now, I also have an oath to fulfill with Loki.  However something tells me that when that oath is fulfilled, I will be seeing some more significant change in my life.