Insight And Premonition: A Poem Of Sight

Tired and weary I went
Up is down and down is up
To seek some sort of peace
Or an ear for my lament

The journey was not soothing
Joyful colors gave no solace
Signs of life noted, not happily
I simply tread on, smiles unstirring

I reached the place of choosing
And spoke my questions all
In the hopes I would find answers
And actions of the Gods, approving

The seer came out, awakened
And stared deeply within
My mind and the world known was reviewed
Until the voice rang out, unshaken

“The life you choose is your own.
They have chosen for themselves.
Dearest one, you know it cannot change
What has grown cannot be unsown”

“Reach out to those that hurt
Find solace in the joining
Share the strength together
Accept that all still play a part”

“Guard thy magic well
Attend to thy wounds carefully
Time for change will be at hand
But for now, hurts will still prevail.”

“I know you wish for more
Perhaps a nicer tale of change?
Know it sits, patiently waiting
Soon to be set for your ever more”

“I hear thy mind race for answers
Trying to make sense or find meaning
Perhaps no sense is what is meant, for now
Instead use thy heart to heal thy cancer”

The seer said nothing further
It was not the comfort I sought
Instead, everything & nothing was said
And now I must leave, ever the wiser

New Age Bashing

Several weeks ago, an article entitled “New Age Bullshit Part 1” popped up in “A Parliament of Owls – Spiritual & Metaphysical Chat for Wandering Owl Fans” discussion group on Facebook. Since then, It’s been on my mind quite a bit.  It’s been on my mind because I agree with some of the author’s points, but I also very much disagree about his stance on the new age movement.

In the article, the author speaks immediately about the jargon people in the new age movement use. (He calls them ‘lightworkers’ in the article).  Specifically, he speaks to how most lightworkers only talk about love and light, Further down in the article he speaks to how some of these people refuse to even consider the darker sides of the soul, speaking to how most lightworkers believe that if they don’t give any energy to that side of them, the dark side can’t hurt them, or basically, it won’t exist.   This is where I do agree with him.  Yes, there are people out there that have been in the new age movement for quite some time and don’t think about anything but ‘the light’ and preach how staying in ‘the light’ allows this and that and allows you to develop <insert touchy-feely statement here>.

I further agree with the author that many of these lightworkers are stuck in their own personal development because they only focus on the light.  But just like the minority of any religious or spiritual discipline that ruin it for the rest of the population, the same thing has happened in the new age movement, and these lightworkers he speaks of are the culprits.  Yes, we are going to get the people that are that are stuck but they claim they are not.  We are also going to get the people in the New Age movement that specifically speak to only certain practices are ‘true’ and only using certain tools are ‘right’ and so on and so forth.  And we should deal with them like we do when we find them in any other aspect under this great big umbrella called paganism:  We need to ignore them and continue our path.  Because if the lightworkers are true to form, anything we say to them is only going to get us angrier.

The author basically leaves his article there, which makes it feel more like a rant to me than being anything informative.  (In all fairness, he did say this was part one, but I could not find anywhere where he had a part two.)  Again, I see his point and can understand why he would rant.  People like the lightworkers he describes can be very frustrating to deal with.  But there are other facets to the new age movement he doesn’t even consider covering in his article, and that’s a shame.

As most of you already know, I do intuitive tarot readings.  Many of the clients that come in to see me for readings are searchers.  Some of these people are clearly out of their comfort zone, they come to me even though they have no idea how a reading works or what to ask.  Some don’t even know how a tarot deck works.  Still, they come because they are searching for something that they cannot name.  Still others come speaking of ‘talents’ or ‘gifts’ their recent ancestors had; and their visit to me is them grasping at straws trying to connect with that talent that might be innate in themselves.

In these cases, I do my best to be the gracious host of the metaphysical realms.  I speak to them and give them ideas on reaching out to their ancestors; or other ways they can start ‘testing’ the waters so to speak.  But I don’t give them too much.  Going straight into how to cast a circle, gathering spell components for a spell or talking about some of the more specific areas of the metaphysical realms are just too much for these clients.

So in short, I give them what some people would call New Age practices to start with.

If you look at some of the practices of the new age belief you will see immediately that they are very basic.  They are easy to comprehend and they can be communicated and understood in a very short period of time.  That makes them the perfect building block for me to present to my clients so they can start building their own foundations for metaphysical practice.  Also, the so called ‘light’ exercises are perfect to help teach protection and grounding; which most newbies desperately need.

The practices I speak about aren’t any that need deep oversight.  I’m also not designating myself as their ‘teacher’ by giving them suggested practices, nor do I say they MUST do them.  I simply suggest them and allow the client to make up their own mind as to whether or not the practice is right for them.  And if they choose to go deeper and want more information, then I can suggest a specific person from the list of people I have that I know to be very reputable and that can give them further information about a specific subject.

Another reason I start with new age practices is because of the terminology of the movement is so common.  Reaching for a common language to communicate to someone is the same thing I do in my day job.  As a technical writer, I constantly have to think about my audience; Is my writing going to someone with technical knowledge so I can let lose more technical terms, or is the audience a group who doesn’t know the difference between Kaizen and a Kanban?

In order to communicate anything, we must first make certain we have a common language.  New age terminology easily bridges that gap.  It also allows me to bypass terms that might scare my clients.  Sure there are things that I still must explain in more detail, but overall I have a common language that I can use to start connecting with my client and help them work through whatever problem they have come to me to get more information on.

The people that come to see me and people like them are some of the biggest reasons why the new age movement is still thriving.  These are people who could be just becoming aware of the energies within and around them and have no idea how to work with that energy.  They might be scared shitless of something they saw, felt or heard and have no idea what to do about it.  Or they are like me when I found new age practices – they are the people that feel deep in their heart and soul that something is missing, and are reaching for the piece of them they cannot define.

I am a Reiki Master, and that, to many people, is a new age practice.  Yet it was my training in Reiki that ultimately led to my being able to control my intuitive gifts and become the adept reader I am today.  It also led to me being able to use healing abilities and helped to teach me not to send out my own energy and deplete my own personal energy sources.  Reiki became my teacher in other ways too.  It was what I reached for as protection when I started doing my own deeper journey work and it has helped deepen my understanding of the Gods as I know them now.  In fact, Reiki still is a very important piece of my spiritual discipline.

When I found Reiki, it was the only thing that I could find in the pagan community that made any sense regarding my healing and intuitive abilities.  I was already pagan; I’d been practicing rituals at that point for roughly 10ish years and no matter how much I searched, I could find no one who could help me with my intuitive and healing gifts.  Reiki was the only thing that helped me understand what I was doing wrong in my practice, and it was the only thing that helped me correct my mistakes properly.

Now had this article been written back then, and had I seen it prior to my decision to be attuned to a new age thing such as Reiki, perhaps I would have reconsidered my decision to become attuned.  And I would not be following the wonderful soul fulfilling path that I currently follow.  I would not be the strong person that I am today.  I would not be devoted to Loki and Odin. I would not be a member of OBOD.  And I would not be a keeper of the Sacred Pipe of my ancestors.  That’s one reason why I’m a bit upset about this article; who is going to read it and step away from possibly the very start of a very fulfilling spiritual path because of what others think about the practices they do?

The whole ‘new age bashing’ in articles like this one also makes me wonder if there is a deeper reason why it happens.  Was there a time where we, in our newbie ignorance, were like those lightworkers perhaps?  Did we condemn practices that weren’t exactly like our own? Or, are we condemning new age practices that are so simple that we in our current knowledge base would now assume that ‘ANY’ newbie should automatically know them as common sense?

Or are we embarrassed at our own beginnings, and that is why the new age movement gets the brunt of the bashing, much like pagan publishers that publish lots of beginner books like Llewellyn publishing (or bash the so called ‘Llewellyn babies’ who read said books), authors that write lots of beginning practice books (Silver RavenWolf) or why books that we once held in high esteem get joked about (Uncle Bucky’s Big Blue anyone?).

Perhaps that is the crux of it.  We all DO have to start somewhere.  Let’s stop bashing those starting points.  And while we are at it, let’s not worry about the lightworkers or other people that choose to stay stuck and help the ones who truly want to reach deeper.  Let’s help them realize that the tools they received and the skills that they learned in the new age movement can help them learn that there is much more to these paths than what they know.  And in the meantime, let’s recognize the new age movement as the stepping block that it can be into a much bigger world.

 

Photo from Deviant Art

Speechless

It’s been almost a month since my last post, and almost two months since the world turned upside down here in the United States.

Since then, so many things have gone through  my mind; things I want to write about, things I need to figure out on my own, things I’d love to get other opinions on.

It isn’t because I haven’t TRIED to write, it’s just that the words right now aren’t coming. And I think there is a reason for that.  I don’t think that the changes that we have seen so far in the world are finished.  And this especially goes for myself.

In the next week, I want to do a reading for 2017 and present it here.  The more information we can get about what we are facing this next year I think the better.  For me and may others, 2016 was the year of work; the year of action.  Something tells me that 2017 is going to be the year of facing that which we have hidden; the year of the cleaning out the proverbial skeletons in the closet.  All 2016 did was get us ready for what we must face in 2017.

But that is only speculation at this point.

So I know what my next post will be, we will see if I’m still speechless after that, or if I finally find words to speak about that which I need to get out.

Everyone have a wonderful and safe holiday.

The Breath Before the Last Push

image
The current path I walk.  The shadows are getting longer, but the trees are still green.

2016 is a year of movement and action, but mostly it’s been a year of work.  I cannot count how many pagans have told me that they have had significant amounts of work come up that they were forced to do.  But the work hasn’t been all that bad.  Most of the work that I have heard about has resulted in significant growth that pays big dividends.  It’s been a pretty good year overall, but everyone I talk to is pretty tired!

Today as I did my daily walk, I noticed that the leaves in the trees haven’t started to change yet.  This was really odd to me, as last year I was commenting that the leaves were mostly changed by mid-August.  Now here it is, mid-September, and there is barely any color.

There are those who probably dismiss this, but I see something a little more spiritual going on.  I think the ‘holding pattern’ has a bit of a spiritual connection to it.   I think it might be a message saying, “Hey, take a breather from your work for a bit.”

Summer is officially over up here.  Today we got our first colder morning.  I wore a jacket into work today for the first time, and my husbands last open water swimming race was this past weekend.  Yet most fall projects aren’t quite starting up yet.

It’s a perfect time to take a little bit of time to rest.

Now I’m not certain how long this rest period will last.  Perhaps tomorrow the trees of the nature path I walk will be awash with colors, and possibly signify that the break is over.  But if you are like me, you are going to take what you can get to be able to go into the last months of this year of action with as much energy as possible.

If You Want Change, you must Move

cocoon_by_vuzelMany times I see people in the Pagan community who get ‘stuck’.  Through no fault of their own, they get into a position that they don’t seem to get out of.  I myself has fallen into this predicament many times in my life.  It doesn’t matter if it is a physical, spiritual or mental issue.  You become unable to move.  And you may feel so lost that you aren’t sure what way is up.  The situation can feel hopeless.  Many times it may take someone else’s help to start you moving to get out of the situation.

Sometimes people who are stuck like this come to me for an intuitive reading.  I have been honored to be the catalyst for some of these people to realize that there are issues in their life that they need to tend to, and that is what is making them stuck.  And I have been excited to watch as they start to lift themselves out of this situation, strengthen their spirit and find new ways to live and grow.  To see this transformation is a blessing in itself.  Someone who is willing to transform their energy also helps to lift others around them.  I think on these clients that have taken my suggestions and transformed with happiness and joy.  I am amazed at how powerful and strong they become.

I also get clients who aren’t for some reason willing to listen to my suggestions.  One pops out in particular, and I will use them for an example.  The reading brought out that this person’s spouse was cheating on them with the client’s best friend.  In fact, the client confirmed this, and went further to say that the best friend suggested to the client that they stay with their spouse because the spouse loved them so much. But the guidance from the reading was very much in disagreement.  The message I got for the client was that they needed to get out of the situation; that it was toxic for the client’s growth as well as their self-esteem.  Yet later, I ran into the client again at a local pagan event, still very much connected to the cheating spouse and best friend, who were at the event with the client.

Change isn’t easy.  It sounds easy, but it’s not.  In order to change, even a little, we have to be willing to change our habits and thinking.  We have to be willing to try something new and stick with those modifications in order to make a change stick.  It doesn’t matter if this change is physical, mental or spiritual; you have to put in the work to get what it is what you want.

In other words, you have to move toward that change.

The people who cannot move toward the change they wish may not be doing it purposefully.  Counselors are taught that when someone is in a situation they refuse to move from, it is because they are still getting something of value out of that change.  It may be negative feedback they are receiving, but they are still receiving something.  In the case of my client, perhaps they feel that they have an identity as a pushover, or a victim.  The client is getting feedback from the spouse and the best friend to stay in the relationship; in other words stay in the victim and/or the pushover role.   And until the client no longer wants that role, they will not make a move to change.

I know the theory sounds simple, and to those from the outside looking at someone stuck in a situation that is harmful to them, we may be flabbergasted that the person cannot change.  But this is far from simple to the person who needs to do the change.  It takes a great deal of courage to step out of that which is comfortable and try something new.  That is where those of us watching someone who is trying to make a change in their life need to tread carefully.  To us, the change a person is trying to make looks easy; but the person making the change feels like every move toward that change is a significant struggle.

Overall, the entire situation is frustrating for both sides, especially when the person who tries to make a change backslides.  It gets even worse when the person is so tied into the negative situation that they recognize it’s bad and constantly talk about the change they want yet never makes a move toward making things better. This happens a lot.  In cases where the person refuses to change, perhaps they are getting something from the people suggesting the changes.  Perhaps they are getting attention because of the situation they are in, and that is their reward for being in the negative situation. Another possibility is that there could be a reason why the change cannot occur yet.  Perhaps they need to understand what it is that is going on around them before they change, so when they are in a similar situation later, they know what they need to do, or could be of service to someone else facing the same change.

So why am I posting about this now?  It’s because I have seen it yet again this past weekend.  It’s the same scenario – someone wanting change, they were invited to come to a ceremony that would be a catalyst for that change, but suddenly they were not able to attend, even though they expressed an interest in trying to better their situation.  And after the event, those same people again started to lament that forces beyond their control forced them to not make it (which wasn’t entirely the case), and lament their woes because they yet again are stuck in a situation they cannot get out of.

It also doesn’t hurt to enlist help when making changes in your life.  In the scenario I presented above, the client might do well with a certified counselor.  Others may do well by looking into speaking with a trusted friend, a spiritual advisor, finding a support group, getting a divinatory reading or looking for help in an area that they have not yet tried.

Perhaps discussing in this post is the very basic theory of why people do and don’t change will help someone understand why they are stuck.  Perhaps someone will look at this and see the theory that is discussed, and have the a-ha moment to get out of this situation. Maybe not.  But writing about it is something that at least helps me.  I was not the only one who recognized that people who needed and wanted to be there to help get them out of the situation were not present.  I was not the only one this past weekend who gets frustrated with people who frequently complain about their situation but never do anything about it.  And perhaps I needed to re-remember the fact that it is THEIR lives, and perhaps they are stuck, but it isn’t my place to help them get ‘unstuck’ without their being a part of it.  I can’t force them to go do something that would force a change in their life.   They have to do it for themselves.  The only thing I can do is to ensure that should they get to the point where they refuse to help themselves, that I am aware that they are at that point and take care not to get involved in a situation with the person where I get pulled into their drama.

If you are someone who wants to make a change, don’t give up.  Even incremental movement is something.   Just being open to moving out of your comfort zone puts you way ahead of the game.  And for me, if people ask me for help, I’ll be there to do what I can, but it will be up to the person who wants to change to move.

Photo from Deviant Art

Following the Ripples of Magic

a_phone____by_gazo

John Beckett recently put up a quick Facebook post that sparked some fun conversation.  He said simply:

“Just had a scam call that left a voicemail, ‘this is the IRS.  We have filed a lawsuit against you.’
Delete.  Block number.”

The first comment was from someone who said to, “Delete.  Block number.  Hex the caller.”

I replied with concerns about that.  The number belongs to the corporation, but where does the hex go?  To the person that was just trying to do their job who put the robo-call together?  To the manager who also was just trying to do their job by telling the person to put the call together?  Or does it go to the CEO of the corporation?

The person who suggested the hex in the first place seemed to dismiss my concern, while another suggested it would just hex the machine.  That made the conversation degrade into a bunch of silliness regarding demons in computers and banishing emails and talk of hacking the entire conversation thread.

The hex comment however is an excellent point to bring up something I have been trying to figure out my stance on for quite some time. When you cast a spell for, or even against someone or some thing, how do you know you aren’t causing ripples that will have unintended consequences?

My personal belief on this for the longest time was that Divinity had a way of making things work through you.  So whatever you did was actually the will of fate, or divinity.  But that didn’t account for free will, something that most magic users believe exists, and something that I was forced to concede when I finally started doing energy work again.

So if we do have free will, we have to take responsibility for our actions.  But that means every bit of our actions, from what you wear to what makeup you buy to what you eat?

I realized that some do feel it goes that far when I was discussing doing a binding spell.  I wanted to do one on a certain coworker who had been known for significant bullying tactics and had me in his sights.  I was discussing the issue with a friend, a lineaged Peruvian Shaman.  He was surprised that I was concerned at all, because in his mind I was changing the fates of thousands of people each day by working for a medical device manufacturer that makes equipment for life saving surgeries.

How can my little technical configuration position affect the lives of thousands of other people?  I can see it, but I’m not directly working on the devices, nor am I in a position of making decisions as to what devices are made, how many, and how they are used by doctors.

So how far does the rabbit hole go on this?  Should you consider all of the implications of the work you are about to do?  What about at your job?  Eating (or not eating) specific things?  Or at that point do you just rest on your morals and do what you have to in order to make ends meet?

A final example to ponder – recently I was part of a discussion with a group of readers and clients at the local pagan store where I give readings.  Two of the readers talked about a gentleman that came in for a reading from both of them at two different times, always wanting to know about how an ex was doing.  Both readers got the feeling that the guy wanted to do harm to his ex.  So one of the readers, a British Traditional Witch (BTW), decided to cast a spell while doing the reading to force the man to forget about the ex.

I personally was appalled.  First, because I wouldn’t have handled it that way at all as a reader, but secondly I was appalled that he would force his will onto someone else, even if it meant to stop violence that may or may not happen.  The witch did say that he knew it was a risk, and accepted the consequences of his actions, but at the time he felt that it was the best course of action for this particular individual.  However, the entire issue was quite unsettling for me.  I think because it continues to bring up the same questions I have over and over.

I realize now that there are times when you can plan your actions, use divination, and carefully word your spells so that they do what they were intended to do.  However, intentions can backfire very quickly, even with the best divinatory tools.  So in those cases, do you just accept your losses, or is the magic let loose on the land, free to spread from person to person through the results of situations started by the initial intent of the spell?  Is it like money, which changes hands from one person to another for one intent, but the receiver then sends on, either through good or bad deeds, because he now had the money to spend?

If anything, the conversation on Mr. Beckett’s Facebook timeline just tells me that I am on to something.  Personally, I know I haven’t figured out my ‘black and white’ truth to this issue.  But I do think there is something else to this now.  Perhaps this needs to be brought up again for discussion as an issue in the pagan community today.  Perhaps in our day and age of throwing insults, watching our presidential candidates making derogatory comments about each other, and seeing how much people in the pagan community classify and judge others, perhaps we have forgotten that our actions and words carry just as much energy as a spell.  And that energy and can heal, or it can hurt.  And that perhaps that word that you say could be just as damaging to the world as a misplaced hex.

Photo by deviant art.

 

 

 

Moving Forward, maybe.


The next few weeks are going to see some big changes.  I can already feel the energy starting to build.  Normally, I am not one for making New Year resolutions, but I think this year I might.  If there is already energy building, why not take advantage of it?

That is, if I can figure out how.

Above is the reading I decided to do to try to get some idea of where and how to do some changes.  I did it with my most relaxed deck, the Paulina Tarot (US Game Systems, author Paulina Cassidy).  I just wanted a snapshot, so I used a Celtic Coss spread.  The cards are as follows:

  1. Eight of swords, usually the significator position.  I don’t use the significator much because I feel this position talks to the energy of the client at this very moment.  All I got out of this card is that I am stuck, not by my own choosing, but at the same time it is.  What’s funny is that I am reminded of Skye/Daisy’s transformation on Agents of Shield.  The organic growth that this card is showing the woman stuck in.  Perhaps that is the transformation starting?
  2. Crossing me, the Hermit.  I am bidding on a position at work that would put me into a position of sort of a consultant.  There is only one person for an entire side of our development process, and that would be this role.  So I see work and the bid is crossing me right now.
  3. The past, the Tower.  I feel like this goes back two years, when I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.  My whole life came crashing down.  But perhaps that was part of this entire plan.
  4. The future, six of wands.  To be honest, I have no idea what to make of this card being there.  Ideas taking flight, images of plans moving forward? I don’t know.
  5. My fears, the seven of pentacles reversed.  I don’t normally read reversed, but this time it feels like I should.  I have done a significant amount of work to get me where I am, and I am afraid of it all wilting quickly.
  6. My hopes and dreams, three of swords.  This one I have no idea again.  It showed up reversed, but it doesn’t feel right.
  7. How others see me, Queen of Wands.  This is a big thing, as my normal identified significator is the Queen of Pentacles.  Perhaps this is a sign of a significant change in my identity?
  8. How I see myself, four of swords.  This is definitely different than the Queen in the previous card.  Perhaps I still have self image and perception work to do.
  9. Environment, six of swords.  Again, I have no idea what to make of this card.
  10. Final outcome, Death.  Well, I guess no matter what is going on and what changes are going to be coming, they are inevitable.

This reading bugs me.  First, because I can read cards so much better than this, and second, because I hate not knowing where it is I am moving toward.  I like plans, I like processes that are spelled out.  I don’t like  unknowns.  But perhaps that is what I am supposed to get used to, the unknown.  How do you prepare for that?  I know that is the point, you don’t prepare, but how do you prepare for that again?

Can’t tell I am a Taurus, can you?