Religious Practice Struggles

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Imbolc is about light coming into the world.  This holiday is what has started a new spiritual struggle for me – Photo from Deviant Art

My task this year is to learn, relearn and polish up all of my knowledge and put together a religious and spiritual practice based on my experience and my ancestry.

As I put together something (ANYTHING at this point!) to celebrate the Imbolc holiday, I have realized that this task is much easier said than done.

The first thing that I have done is to start going through my older holiday ceremony, go through historical information and taken a look at what some other bloggers have said about the holiday.  But after I gathered all of that information, I realized, that is all great for these other people, but it’s not ME; it’s not MINE.

I am quickly realizing that in order to be true to my ancestry, I’m going to have to start putting together things on my own.  I am not a re-constructionist, even though that would seem to me to be the easier path.  I am not fully Celtic nor am I fully Pagan, as my German ancestry still screams to be heard.  I am also not fully of the Norse, as the Native blood in my veins quickly reminds me that Turtle Island is my home. But yet I am not fully Native, as the Anglo Saxon/Irish heritage stirs my soul.

It’s made things pretty difficult, to say the least.

But as I said when I built this blog in the first place, this is for me to vet and work through my own beliefs and practices.  With that in mind, I plan to ask my pipe if it wishes to be smoked during Imbolc to honor my Native heritage.  I will bless my gardens in honoring Beyla, the landwrights and vaettir and my German heritage.  Finally, I will do a small fire ritual to honor my Celtic heritage.

Perhaps in time I will be able to blend all of these into one full ceremony, but until I can wrap my brain around the mingling of traditions I guess it’s going to have to be separate.

 

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Author: Karlesha

I am a martial artist, historical fencer, yogi, runner, intuitive / empath and pagan. My passion is learning about myself, where I fit in the world and where I can do the most good. I am dedicated to Loki and Odin.

3 thoughts on “Religious Practice Struggles”

  1. I have similar issues with blending multiple traditions. I wanted to honor all of my ancestry and cultural upbringing right from the start, but I discovered that it was too much to take on all at once. My divinations consistently told me as much too. I’ve compromised with thoroughly getting to know one culture at a time and moving onto a syncretic tradition only when I feel that I am ready and can do it “properly” (=> relative to my own spiritual development). I am already somewhat syncretic, but my current focus is on the Anglo Saxons. Although my grove alternates cultural traditions with each High Day, my private practice is not ready for it.

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  2. It’s always easier to simply go down that path that’s wide and well-used, harder to walk out and create your own. I do the same, in a way. It’s a struggle at times but after all… if the common path just feels WRONG, what choice do we have? I just think it important to accept that we might not get it right the first time around, we might take a wrong turn now and then but it’s alright. It’s a long process to put our own practices together!

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  3. ShellyLorraine – A syncretic tradition is exactly what it feels like I am being pushed toward. Thanks for sharing that term! But the feeling I am getting is that I am more ready than I am giving myself credit for to start building this personal tradition.

    FNY – exactly! When it feels wrong, we don’t have a choice. And at the same time, we worry about doing something wrong and having to deal with the consequences of doing said thing wrong.

    So we want to push to learn everything we can about a certain tradition before we move forward, and what I am quickly realizing is that there are so many interpretations of said traditions that we will never be able to learn EVERYTHING there is to know; especially because the historical documentation itself can be biased. So it means we have to dive in and do what we think is right now, no matter how scary that thought is.

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