Destructive Awakening; Dealing with Spiritual Struggle

theaesir on occasion has some articles that make you think.  Currently I am having some very hard time standing still, as I’ve talked about in my last posts.  So when I saw this post about how Awakening is a Destructive process, I realized that this topic is something that although discussed a lot, isn’t something that we truly understand unless it is currently happening to us at the present time.  But it would do us service to remember it more often.

Psychologically, we as humans don’t do something unless we get some sort of reward out of it.  An easy example of this is overeating.  I still have problems with this from time to time.  Inevitably, I get triggered by something that starts to give me uncomfortable feelings.  It could be a problem at work, lack of sleep or a multitude of other things.  But I know subconsciously, if I get uncomfortable with something, I can put something in my mouth, albeit chocolate, coffee, chips or other unhealthy things, to help me deal with that uncomfortable feeling.  The food that I put in my mouth will inevitably allow my brain to release endorphins in my blood, which makes me feel better.  That is my reward for eating, and thus, I also side step those uncomfortable feelings.

But those endorphins don’t last long, and sooner or later that uncomfortable feeling comes back.  So do I eat again, causing myself more problems down the road by gaining weight, or should I start focusing on what it is that makes us uncomfortable?  It’s a simple yet painful dilemma.  I either get the quick reward from eating, or I travel the hard road of dealing with what makes me uncomfortable and take away the trigger.

Not only do we have to deal with psychological issues, but many of us on a spiritual path have to deal with the exact same thing in the spiritual realm as well.  What I hear my Gods tell me is to surrender to the uncomfortable feelings and the suffering it brings.  They tell me the only true way to deal with emotions is not to hide from them, but to lean in to that which hurts and find the root of the problem.  Once that is done, we will have started to shatter that which has hold on us.  Then are able to move forward.  But this time, we move forward as more awakened beings who are more in tune to the earth and much more alive.

This destructive process is different for everyone.  It’s even hard to explain to another pagan because it is such a personal experience.  Over the years I have heard about many journeys and stories of reconciliation of struggle from friends, and many are vivid accounts of issues and problems that seem to melt away once they finally start to understand where the true suffering is coming from.  Even though the experience and timing of these spiritual struggles various, the term ‘dark night of the soul’ has been coined in part because the struggle is shared by so many.

As we are starting to prepare for a new year, I am certain that many of the people who read this already are having struggles of their own, or will have to rise up to meet a struggle like this sometime soon.  Remember that you are not alone, that the process will take as long as it takes, and that there will be an end to the struggle.  And what will come out of the struggle is a stronger, more connected, more authentic person.

Enlightenment is a destructive process.
It has nothing to do with becoming better or being happier.
Enlightenment is the
crumbling away of untruth. It’s seeing
through the facade of pretense. It’s the
complete eradication of everything we
imagined to be true.
– Adyashanti



Author: Karlesha

I am a martial artist, historical fencer, yogi, runner, intuitive / empath, diviner and pagan. My passion is learning about myself, where I fit in the world and where I can do the most good.

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