I take a break from my day job by taking a daily walk around the area near my work. Normally, the stroll involves a dead end street that has very few businesses and lots of trees.
As fall hits the Midwest, I have been struck by how much the trees have changed after the falling of the leaves. The trunks of some of these trees seem like they have become whiter as the days grow colder. That whitening very much reminds me of the process of bones being whitened by their exposure.
The analogy fits for the time of the year. The celebration of death and the harvest has come and gone. Now we are catching our breath and be still before the rush of holiday mundanity hits us between Thanksgiving and New Year’s day.
The vision of those whitening trees awoke in me another realization. It takes stillness to start the transformation into something new. Stillness allows you to look within yourself and listen for the voice that gives you direction to move forward in a new way. We must make time for that stillness in order to understand what our next steps in this life are in preparation for the new beginnings of Yule.
This is so very true for me in this moment. I recognize the need to be still and let my own bones picked clean of things that I no longer need in my life. I need to recognize the fact that I am enough. I don’t need the baggage I have carried around for years in order to move forward spiritually anymore. I am OK to be who it is I am; no gimmicks, no self-imposed guilt, no Ego. Just me, myself and I standing in the dark, ready to accept what is in store.
It’s harder than it sounds; I felt like I have pushed myself to have control for a significant portion of my life. Now in many aspects of my life I am no longer in control, and I have had to learn to be OK with it. Further, the only way to really be true to what it is I am and what I am to do is to recognize that I don’t need to be in control of what is happening. I just need to learn to trust myself and my strengths in order to get through this time within my life.
When I started this new path, I was told that things would be uncomfortable; but that I would never be lead into things I could not handle. I deeply trust in that. I am being asked to be still and look into that which I am frightened of during this dark time of the year. I will do my best to do just that.